When Maggie Hansen and a group of 11 of their friends made their trip to San Diego for them Bachelorette party Last year, she and her honorary girls tried to be as transparent as possible what the 12 participants would be. Some could be expected, such as the flight price and a wine tasting, but there were also unpredictable expenses such as Ubers, bar tabs and much more.
While the financial costs of the vacation were inevitable, Hansen wanted to avoid adding emotional: in particular the feeling of resentment, guilt or disappointment, which often occur with group trips. Since income and expenditure habits vary within a group of friends, these feelings can multiply and fiddle. A friend cannot drink alcohol or eat meat. This can easily lead to problems if you are expected to share cocktail and steak-haired tabs with your friends. Another can earn much less than others in the group, but it is uncomfortable to admit this fact.
Hansen’s dilemma will be known to many 20- and 30-year-olds who have always visited expensive weekend trips with friends. Target weddingsOr even concerts. Almost 40% of gene z and millennials state to have a friend who handed them over to them, it is said Data from credit karmaAnd during the meal and birthday celebrations, expenses, weddings as well as bachelor and bachelor department often lead to special pain points. You feel about 56% of the members of these generations Must participate in these events Even if it will be financially charged to you, a separate Credit karma survey results. As a result, 38% state that they have accepted debts.
The 31 -year -old Hansen tried to avoid these results. First she asked about the preferences of her friends about the Google The survey of anything was booked, and the planning of the budgets of friends who are educators as well as those who work in more lucrative careers than sales. The group also used apps such as SplitWise and Tab to pursue what everyone has output (with SplitWise, friends can use the tabs of how they want, and control and tips are automatically recalculated). In this way, friends who did not participate in drinks during dinner were not obliged to separate the costs while they were not accepted, and there was no unpleasant dance of that, especially at that time, especially since some of the participants met for the first time. It enabled everyone to stick to their own budget.
For less good friends, Hansen was able to use credit card points to pay their flights. Her wedding witness has exercised payment plans with friends who wanted to participate, could not carry out the total costs at a time. Hansen admits that she was lucky enough to do this and that it was not a financial burden for her honorary girl. It only works if everyone is honest what he can record.
“I tried to make it where it is not pressure,” she says. “If you need help, this is my wedding and I want you to be part of it. And I can choose to help.”
The etiquette of Tripse-Expense trips
Before major events or weekend trips, it is a must to discuss the expenditure expectant expectations, says Thomas P. Farley, a keynote spokesman and etiquette expert, who is also known as Mister Maners.
“There should be no surprises financially,” says Farley. “Although this seems excessively pragmatic, this can help to avoid misunderstandings, injured feelings and injured credit cards afterwards.”
If you ask people to go on a trip, consider whether there are expenses that you can completely cover, like an exclusive dinner or an excursion, and make it known from the jump you will pay for it. This could help reduce the tension: According to the credit karma survey, 48% of the millennials and gen z -questioned that the bride or the groom should cover at least some of the costs for a bachelor’s or bachelor trip such as trips and accommodation. 32% believe that the bride or the groom should all cover their costs.
Also remember that guests may have to take free work to take part in other events in their lives. Try to create a room where friends feel safe to discuss their financial expectations. Money can cause fear and other increased emotions, and they want to be sure that everyone has a good time without worrying about the condition of their bank account.
“To be open and honest where you are financially, can help you and your friends to understand the relationship of the other with money better” Allied financially.
How to unsubscribe
That means the person who plans the trip can only do so much. According to Farley, those with limited means or different financial priorities must be “brave enough to separate”. Skip parts of the route that do not fit into your budget if necessary. Yes, it can feel uncomfortable or uncomfortable, but friends will understand their limits.
“No friend should lose your sleep” If it is not in your budget, it is better to share it openly. ”
Jamila Musayeva, a certified etiquette trainer of the International etiquette and Protocol Academy of London, says that she should approach the conversation about the collective comfort instead of carrying out a person in the group. This helps open the door to honest dialogue.
“The most graceful way to approach it is with clarity and friendliness,” says Musyeva. “You could say: ‘I would like to participate and I would like to make sure that we are all geared towards the budget expectations before we book something. Should we set an output area so that everyone feels comfortable?”
If someone suggests an expensive activity that you cannot work in your budget, it is okay to push back, but the sound is everything in these situations, she says. You want to be warm, casual and proactive.
“A polite but firm way to answer:” That sounds amazing! It could be a bit outside of my current budget. Would someone be open to a more reserved option? “, She says.” You can also offer alternatives to show that you are still enthusiastic about participating in your means. ”
If you are the friend with the limited budget, you should be included in the planning process, says Zina Kumok, financial advisor and personnel financing expert. In this way you can have some control over the costs.
“It is not fair if your friends plan everything and then complain that you cannot afford it, you have to get involved,” says Kumok. “If you don’t have time to plan, you have to give your friends your overall budget and ask if you can stick to it.”
Take a look at yourself
In situations in which large discrepancies between who ordered in a restaurant, or if a friend routinely pays more than his fair share, Andrea was a personal financial and budgeting expert that is acceptable to request separate checks. This can help “avoid the unpleasant moment if you try to take the bill,” says Woroch. Inform your server at the beginning of the meal.
Otherwise, you will discuss a discussion before your group goes to how the invoice is divided. Regardless of this, you ensure that someone in the group either takes a photo of all income or keep the physical copies in one place.
Erika Rasure, Chief Financial Wellness Advisor at Over and beyond Finance, a financial service company, suggests putting aside 15 minutes after receiving the invitation to check your budget and see how much you (or want to) want to (or want). If you fear that you are blowing up your budget at the moment -which can be easy to do with friends at a good time -she suggests loading her budget on a prepaid debit card before the trip.
“In this way, you can wipe without worrying that you will pass or touch your credit card,” says Rasure. “It’s a really simple tool with which you will stay up to date.”
